Why do Strong Women suffer in relationships?
By Monika Singh
People, situations, circumstances, experiences, pain, bullying, and there are several things which have strengthened you!
You are stronger now. It’s not your fault! And there is no going back!
Women tolerate abuse because of emotional vulnerability. - Gul Panag
Contents
1. Strong Woman
2. Strong Woman, Strong Man
3. Strong woman with an Average man
4. Imbalance in Personality and Relationships
5. Why do strong girls fall for bad boys?
6. Why does a man go for a woman who does not use her brain much?
7. Myth of beauty
8. How are Wicked Women good at tuning men on their fingers?
1. Strong Woman
If you are strong, It’s not your fault!
But do not let others use you in the name of strength, tolerance, and patience.
Be it in common relation with friends, colleagues, romantic, or any other form of relationship.
You are strong, and you might find it normal or can tolerate the unnecessary ego and drama in your relations. But if you allow them to get away with it once, you are telling them they can get away with it every time.
It is a terrible experience for several strong girls, and more friction comes from their family members or guardians. Sometimes from parents too!
So, I hope you understand the importance of raising your voice!
Before moving ahead, I want to tell you it may contain some mature content. If you are uncomfortable or do not understand such things, kindly do not read further.
2. Strong Woman, Strong Man
It might seem like they are made for each other initially, but it is not after some months.
A strong woman who is emotionally, & financially independent will struggle to balance power over her partner because he doesn’t want to feel weak.
He wants her to be submissive because of his strength. So he continues his attempts to claim dominance in their relationship.
And people teach girls to be the caretakers and compassionate women who have to sacrifice their will & desire for their partner.
So, she ended up struggling more.
3. Strong woman with an Average man
No matter how successful or independent women are, they become victims of their idea of a perfect fairy tale life. While men often become abusive to overcome their insecurities.
Such men can repeatedly humiliate you in front of their friends, family members, relatives, or any 3rd person.
So, she ended up struggling more.
4. Imbalance in Personality and Relationships
When people have a good image in the outside society, their only space to let out imperfection is their own home.
So, if he is a nice guy to society, he’ll let out all his frustration at home. He can be violent beyond expectation.
He gets violent if women do not work according to his will, demand, habits, taste, and control.
So, she ended up struggling more.
5. Why do strong girls fall for bad boys?
Women feel that bad boys (not in the sense of character or criminal-minded person) will protect them from the outside world.
Why does it happen?
Even the most intelligent girl can lose her mind to her heart. The instant urge to help a man by supporting him emotionally to bring him on the right track covers her mind.
Such men take advantage of the vulnerability of women who crave a home, family, and other domestic bliss.
So, she ended up struggling more.
6. Why does a man go for a woman who does not use her brain much?
If a man is wise, the lady feels proud of his man.
But, a man does not always feel proud if the lady is wise. She becomes a new competition for his mind. And he might get insecure, or he will start looking for other flaws in her, which will imbalance the relationship.
Men are strong, intelligent, and imaginative, while women are physically weak and known for not-so-wise or often emotional decisions.
All relationships go through cycles and phases. The honeymoon period doesn’t last forever. Work stress and family obligations can get in the way.
And in all this, he would not like an interruption from the woman, who would like to create mental pressure on him.
So, they go for women who do not use their brains much.
Women let men work for them, think for them, and take on their responsibilities. When a man feels like a king, at least in front of his woman, it boosts his ego.
So, the man goes for a woman who does not use her brain much.
If she is smart, she doesn’t use it much in front of her man intentionally. If she used it, she ended up struggling more.
7. Myth of beauty
People say that beauty will help you to keep your man in place. And they define beauty as a beautiful face and a perfect body figure.
Poets and sometimes inspirational & motivational writers tell you that outer beauty doesn’t matter.
Which is nowhere the complete truth.
The beauty of thought and inner beauty also matter, along with outer beauty.
Ignoring a significant factor is like missing an essential element in the Science lab, whose output will be unexpected.
The fact is:
Where the beauty of the face can help with short-term satisfaction.
The beauty of thoughts (compatibility) and inner beauty (purity of heart) helps to keep the relationship in place for the long term.
And all three are essential in the necessary ratio!
8. How wicked women are good at tuning men on their fingers
Have you ever wondered why most men prefer the nastier girl to date?
She is clever and wicked. Who is innocent, beautiful, and glamorous by her face and looks for the outside world. Who can be dangerous & devil by heart!
According to psychologists and therapists, such women have had unfortunate learning experiences, especially about men. So, they developed a manipulative approach to dominate and control the surrounding men.
They understand how much a man will surrender to pursue sexual access.
They know how to make him feel that there is no friction and that the man controls the relationship.
There are so many secrets only they can understand and learn about men, along with the therapists and relationship counselors.
Ultimately, a man does not feel safe to show his vulnerability for one or more reasons to their partner, who deserves it. And wicked women ended up tuning them.
So, a strong woman ended up suffering.
Resources:
Good Men Project, Firstpost, observation, experiences of surrounding, books on relationships written by counselors and therapists, conversations with several other strong women who are either married or in Relationships.
I want to share as I’ve learned this from the behavior of people in my surroundings, going through the ups & downs of my life & the several other women (especially Married) I’ve interacted with in the Journey!
If you understand these, it can help you a lot. Go over it again, take your decisions with wisdom & overcome your weaknesses! All the best!
Your small contribution can help lots of Strong Women to suffer less!
For a better understanding, read Emotions, Guilt, and Suffering
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